My thoughts

Hi readers

 

I didn’t realize I forgot to post anything pass few days. I was kinda too tired to even remember what I suppose to do.

 

I know that I need do a lot of stuff but too tired or just can’t find the time to do it. As you know, AFA has ended yesterday! I didn’t manage to even cos. I got no shoe, never style my wig and I am just plain tired!

 

End up just go for a while to walk around. Spend $28 which is $8 entrance and $20 for the performance section. I went off after 3 hours as I was tired to stay longer and take pictures. I see nice cosplayer make me wonder if I make the right choice to stop so soon.

 

Yes I decide to tone as I getting tired and busy with work. I know it kinda wasted as I prepare a lot for this year alone.

It kinda sad to know that I not gonna do it much!

It just no one to push me. Used to be by my ex. She will push me so I will remember to do and also finish all the props too.

But nowadays my current doesn’t have the same interest. Sometime I wonder why she with me.

I can’t discuss with her about anime. I don’t even discuss about music with her. It just problem talk. Mostly her problem. Getting on my nerve sometime. I don’t want think about it but it like everyday sure got something not right about her family.

Just think about it I get a headache.

 

I don’t know what else to do sometime. I feel sad sometime want to cry it out when I have no motivation do my hobby. Been doing this for 11 years if count this EOY. So kinda sad if I just give up like that. I don’t want to end it just like this. It wasted and I found friends and ENEMY too. But that parcel of life.

 

When I went to event I feel so alone. No one to talk to. Last time yes lots of friends even enemy saw and try avoid me. But now NO ONE.

 

I don’t blame anyone for this, But it just that I feel sad about it. Imagine you into something for so long end up it just end like that!

I can’t let it happen but I got no power to stop it. Every time I want do and ask for quotation on costume and whatever I end up never even go and buy the costume.

 

I never blame anyone. But I need the push. Used to have the motivation. Looking forward to events and group meeting. But now it just empty feelimg!

 

There 2 event coming in December. One here and another in KL.

Going to both but to cosplay for both I not so sure.

 

I was thinking buying from the shop at Plaza Sing when I get my pay this coming Dec.

Don’t buy anything else.

 

Okie…Time to motivate myself to do it.

 

Pushing myself!!!

 

Pray hard I don’t crumble again!

 

 

Haiz T.T